About Douglas Keller

Hi My name is Douglas Keller I am a singer song writer I'm from just a normal town my first memories are my parents constantly fighting and lots of mental and physical abuse that wasn't bad though growing up my version of life is it's hard/bad but you get use to it and then it gets worse and you get use to that and then worse so I've kinda grown to like pain over the years I have very bad depression now it's always a struggle I take no meds and I don't want to I just started singing in front of people a year ago I always sang when no one was around but I was terrified to sing in front of people from all the mental and physical abuse and when I was 12 I was already out on my own staying with friends and girl friends so I always felt kind of alone and it just made me extremely shy over the years but I have always known I that I am going to be a great singer one day and I still know it I finally overcame my fear last year and sang in front of one of my friends on 10/26/10 so not even a year yet when I first sang in front of people you could here the fear in my voice the trebling but over the past year my confidence has grown more than I could have imagined and everyday it gets better I know I am a great singer and song writer I am blessed by god and Jesus I would have never made it this far without them and I would never accomplish my dreams with out them I am on a mission almost to prove that anything is possible with the Lord and Jesus Christ now they don't just magically make it happen it takes a lot of hard work and I do work very hard my whole life has been nothing but right now I am a dishwasher and a cook its an awful job I work extremely hard there for no money at all I pay child support I have a 2 year old song my hourly rate averages out to about $5.35 and hour I have no hope of getting a house or car or anything really with that kind of money I spend most of my hard earned money on the music I make now but I really feel like it is all worth it my kids mother and I are no longer together she is with one of my best friends I grew up with we don't talk much anymore but I do forgive him they have a kid together now and the are engaged I wish them the best though it never really bothered me too I don't know why I guess I've just been threw worse shit than that I've tried to kill myself one time I fell in love for the 1st time when I was 16 and growing up I never felt love before never knew what it was like and I met this girl and she loved me and I her and it was just amazing nothing like it at 1st but that's when I really learned what pain is physical but almost has no effect anymore it just doesn't compare to emotional pain my 1st love though awful lol she was addicted to drinking and drugs just like my dad that's where most of the abuse came from as a child but she just destroyed my I cried everyday for a year and prayed for death all the time and one day I made the decision to do it myself I told everyone for about 2 weeks that I was going to kill myself but no one listened she was with my other friend who was trying to sleep with her and I called her and told her I was going to and she told me to do what I have to do so I drank a bottle of toilet bowl cleaner mostly acidic this was the worst physical pain in my life I think I died for a moment I laid down and all the pain stopped and it was peaceful and everything went white but there was a kid there and he had heard my screams and called the police and someone had picked me up and shook me back to life right as I left and I suddenly wanted to live it was long very painful but I woke up a few days later in the hospital tied down with tubes all in my mouth I couldn't even swallow my spit for a 2 weeks I thought I would never eat again unless it was threw a tube my dreams of singing were gone I could barely talk but long story short I made a full recovery and can sing even better then I could before which is insane now things are horrible still some days I cry every 15 minutes but I just keep working and working on my music and keep my faith that I am going to be great one day and I will be nothing can stop me I have made it so far and I am not turning back that's just a little about my life but looking back at all the bad times I would do it all again if I had to and wouldn't change anything because I know where I am going and they will all be worth it in the end and I also use all of these emotions and times in my writing all my songs are about real life situations no one has ever told or pushed god and Jesus into my life they have made their own way into my life and I am so glad that they did I would be lost without them I pray everyday and they are always there for me without them I would feel completely alone and lost but with them I know I am on the right path and doing the right things most of the time I do make mistakes I am human I've made a lot of bad choices growing up but like I said I'd do it again no regrets youtube search issues1811

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